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I’m not against more than one Maid-of-Honor.  But just make sure that they all get along.  More than one may create confusion.  When it comes to doing something for the wedding, like planning the bridal shower, the process can get ugly.

This happened to me.  My two Maids-of-Honor have very different personalities.  I’m not gonna go into details, but I got constant complaints from both of them until the shower.  At one point, I didn’t want a shower anymore because it was stressing me out more than my own wedding planning, not to mention it was stressing my Maids-of-Honor too.

If money is an issue (e.g. hosting the bridal shower), you still don’t need to have more than one Maid-of-Honor.  Make sure you let your Maid-of-Honor know that any bridal shower is fine with you and it’s okay for her to spend only what she can afford.

I actually don’t have bridesmaids, only two maids-of-honor. And I asked them both in different ways.

I. Maid-of-Honor M is getting married in February 2011 and her colors are black and white with deep red roses. When I saw these organizers, I thought it would be perfect for her planning…

To use it, I decided to label the hanging folders with bridesmaid stuff: Attire, Checklist, and Timeline. But I placed a different type of checklist in the Checklist folder.

II. Maid-of-Honor K loves giving and receiving cards. So I decided to ask her with a card…

I decided to create a 4-part card to slowly reveal my intent of asking her to be one of my maids-of-honor. Of course I won’t make a card without creating a template too for everyone! So stay tuned for instructions and template.

How did you ask your bridal party?

We aren’t planning on having a big wedding party.  In fact, we might not even have a maid-of-honor and a best man.  But as I go through my wedding planning, my wonderful friends have been there for me like a bride’s dream team of bridesmaids.

Photo from Getty Images

Then I saw this article at A Practical Wedding about asking friends to be “non-bridesmaids” when you’re not having a bridal party / bridesmaids at your wedding.  I think it’s an interesting idea.  Even though I’m not having a wedding party, I still want my friends to be part of my wedding and I want them to know how much I appreciate them.  As a non-bridesmaid, they won’t need to shell out money for bridesmaid dresses (that they might not be able to wear again), shoes, accessories, hair, make-up, etc.  They are free to do what bridesmaids do, but are not obligated to do so.  And of course, they get special treats from me

But before I decide whether to have non-bridesmaids or not, I would like to know how others would feel if they are asked to be non-bridesmaids.

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Of Honor!  My good friend surprised me with a gift after work.  I thought she was just being nice, she’s like that.  She asked me to open the card first.  As I was reading it, I started to get the feeling that she was gonna ask me to be in her bridal party.  Then I saw the word “Maid of Honor”!

I was so surprised that I cried!  I opened the box and there was this cute pink tote that has “Maid of Honor” embroidered on it.  I was so honored and I am so excited to be part of my friend’s wedding.

I’ve been a Maid of Honor twice before, but the couples lived in the Philippines and I lived in NY.  This time, everybody lives in NY so I’m so excited I could really help and do something