Image from Ava Aston blog

Learn from my mistake, don’t tell people everything you’re planning for the wedding.  I was so excited in the beginning of my planning that I just kept talking about it to almost everybody who will listen.  Then I realized there’s almost nothing left of my wedding they don’t know about, they will no longer be surprised with all the details I worked so hard on.

Another regret was that I told somebody that he can bring someone with him to the wedding.  Now that my guestlist is getting out of hand, we’ve decided we’re not including an “and guest” for singles who know at least a few of the other guests, and he’s in that category  I’ve heard him trying to figure out who he should take with him and I don’t know what to do.

Image by Aurora Photography

Believe me, you would be filling out a lot of forms (mostly contest forms / raffle tickets) when you go to bridal shows.  Take this tip from Miss Buttons of WeddingBee.  Bring pre-printed address labels with your name, address, email address, and phone number that you can stick on this forms. This will save time and wrist pain.

I have originally planned to do my own flowers.  But it seemed to cost more than I was expecting to spend… from all the stuff I need (vases, buckets, tools, etc) to take to Newport, to the additional vehicle we have to rent to lug all these stuff.  After talking to a few professional florists and crunching the numbers, I found out that the money I will be saving from DIYing wasn’t a lot.  It is not worth the hassle and uncertainty of DIYing all my wedding flowers.  So I decided to hire a florist.

Image from Getty Images

Below are the Rhode Island florists that I inquired with (price comparison at the bottom)…

Florals by Alisa

Allie & Lisa were very responsive.  They usually email back same day or early morning the day after (when I emailed them at night).  They were able to give me a price quote based on my description of what I want in just a couple of days.  I love how they described everything.  The flowers they have chosen were perfect.  They were right on.

We met with Lisa to discuss more about what I wanted.  She was very sweet and even admired my centerpiece mock-up made of tissue.  She has that enthusiasm I look for in a vendor.  I requested a centerpiece sample ahead of time so I can pick it up at our meeting and use it for our menu tasting at Belle Mer.  It cost the same as the price quote.

Golden Gate Studios

Jay of Golden Gate Studios was very responsive in the beginning.  He called me early in the morning the day after I emailed him, and he was on his way to a wedding.  He took the time to let me know he got my inquiry and to talk to me more about my wedding, knowing that he was going away that week.  Since I couldn’t go to RI soon, I asked him if I could email him the details I have in mind and he could email me the quote.  After that, I didn’t hear from him.

I followed up after more than a week via email and still didn’t get a response.  Thinking he wasn’t getting my emails, I contacted him via his website like in the beginning.  But didn’t get a response.  A week after, I got a phone call from him.  He said he was busy with work for the holidays and he prefers calls instead of emails.  His other clients said the same thing, just call him and he answers or calls back right away.  Since then I just called him and he either answered his phone or returned my call just a few minutes after.

We decided to meet with him and get a quote at the meeting.  He was very nice and took the time to discuss all the details of what I’m envisioning.  He wrote his notes and gave me a quote right there.  Before we left, he gave me a bouquet of flowers.  He was very sweet!

Toni Chandler Florals

Toni Chandler’s assistant handled all the email correspondence.  It usually took a couple of days before I get a response.  I didn’t get to talk to Toni until 8 days after my first inquiry.  The phone appointment was set up by her assistant.

As soon as Toni and I talked on the phone, I felt very comfortable.  We talked like girlfriends.  She got my vision right away and made excellent suggestions.  She offered a lot of advice regarding my venue as well.  The conversation made me very excited to see her work.  At the end of the conversation, she told me that she would be able to send me a quote in 2 days.  I didn’t get the quote in 2 days, so I emailed her 7 days after.  Her assistant emailed me back that same day with the quote.

Pricing:  I will not be posting specific prices, but I’m including the differences between the quotes from the three florists.  Click here for the Floral Price Comparison.

I live in NY and my wedding is in Newport RI.  So the two ways I usually communicate with wedding vendors are phone and email.  But I prefer email over phone for a few reasons.

Image from The Moxie Mash

• Whenever I think of something to tell or ask a vendor, I feel like I’m less intrusive when I just email them and they can respond to me whenever they can.  Unless of course I need an answer right away, then I call.
• I am able to gather my thoughts better in an email.  Sometimes I forget things I need to say over the phone.
• I can proofread what I wrote in an email and make sure I said things correctly and tactfully.  I am able to control my emotions better while writing an email than talking on the phone.
• And my number 1 reason… Using email, I have written proof of the conversation.  Unfortunately, I have had vendors or representatives of vendors forget (or pretend to forget) what they told me over the phone.

It definitely helps that I have access to my emails most of the time.  But there are other cases that I prefer phone over email, like if I want an answer right away or when the conversation requires quick responses back and forth.  Best Practices has a good list of pros and cons of using phone and email.

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Most of the best wedding ideas I found were from reading and participating in a wedding forum.  I get to connect with so many brides from all over the world!  A local forum is also best to get recommendations and advice for your wedding location, especially if you’re not very familiar with your location (e.g. destination wedding).  A forum is also a great way to get different opinions on a topic.  I had so many moments where I couldn’t decide on something (my fiance wasn’t any help) and my forum buddies saved the day!

My favorite wedding forums:
TheKnot Community Board
WeddingWire Wedding Forums
Best Destination Wedding Forum

Photo from Getty Images

I love talking about my wedding in person and here at Aylee Bits.  My friends even helped picking out the venue, the first wedding vendor we booked.  They’ve helped out with other things and they even saw my dress.

Recently, a thought occurred to me.  What else do I have left of my wedding that they haven’t seen?  I’ve talked to them about almost everything!  So I’m gonna try to not talk about our wedding so much from now on.  I want to keep a little element of surprise for my guests.  Don’t worry, I’m still gonna blog about most of it since most of my family and friends don’t visit my blog.  And the rest?  I’ll blog about them after the wedding, so I have something to talk about .

Image from VTSK Parents Club

I suggest creating a separate email (if you don’t already have one), if you’re planning to sign up or register for wedding-related stuff online, enter contests, attend bridal shows, etc.  You wouldn’t want spam clogging your personal email.  I also like a little anonymity online for safety purposes so I suggest not using a username or email address that is too revealing of your identity.  Click here for the top free email services from About.com.

My friends think I’m crazy when it comes to organizing some things.  But it’s a trait I don’t think I will ever try to change.  So as expected, I try to organize my wedding planning as much as I can.  Here’s a glimpse of how I organize my planning:

Wedding Spreadsheet:
- MS Excel file
- printed and filed in a binder

• Vendor questionaires and comparisons
• Budget and Expenses
• Guest List
• Planning Timeline and Checklist
• Shopping and Packing Checklist
• Week-of and Day-of Timeline
• Ceremony and Reception Layout
• Vendor packets (details each vendor need to know)

Wedding-Files Folder:

• Saved correspondence (including emails)
• Designs
• Important info about the wedding
• Resources

Wedding-Photos Folder:

• Inspiration Photos
• Photos of items I plan/want to buy
• Photos taken during planning

Wedding Bookmark Folder:
- Internet Explorer and Firefox

• Important sites

Calendar:
- Yahoo! Calendar and MS Outlook

• Timeline and due dates with alarm if necessary

Contacts/Address Book:
- Yahoo! Contacts

• Wedding vendors
• Wedding friends and consultants

Notes:
- MS Outlook

• Random Ideas
• To Do List

All the above are saved or backed-up in my computer.  Every night, I sync my computer and phone so I can access everything on the go and update them if necessary.  All contracts, brochures, receipts, and other papers are filed in a binder.

If you don’t want to set up your own wedding organization, I suggest using the online Weddingwire Planner.  It is very intuitive and easy.  It also comes with an iPhone app.  If only it can generate a more custom report and has alarm options, it would be perfect.

How do you organize your wedding plans?

I’ve been planning our wedding for more than a year now, 17 months to be exact.  And I have collected a lot of helpful wedding tips along the way, including tips based on my own experiences.  So I would like to pass them along by posting wedding tips on this blog regularly.  I hope these tips help you with your own wedding planning.

If you have a wedding tip you want to share, please contact me so I can feature it here at Aylee Bits.  Don’t forget to give me your website/blog, if any, so I can link it as well.

I actually don’t have bridesmaids, only two maids-of-honor. And I asked them both in different ways.

I. Maid-of-Honor M is getting married in February 2011 and her colors are black and white with deep red roses. When I saw these organizers, I thought it would be perfect for her planning…

To use it, I decided to label the hanging folders with bridesmaid stuff: Attire, Checklist, and Timeline. But I placed a different type of checklist in the Checklist folder.

II. Maid-of-Honor K loves giving and receiving cards. So I decided to ask her with a card…

I decided to create a 4-part card to slowly reveal my intent of asking her to be one of my maids-of-honor. Of course I won’t make a card without creating a template too for everyone! So stay tuned for instructions and template.

How did you ask your bridal party?